The struggles are plentiful at the moment. Information inconsistent. It is like rock climbing blindfolded, as you try to determine where to hold on and where to place your feet. At his beside I fight back tears as the frustration mounts, and quiet the screams inside.

Finally though the doctors spoke to me….. it is their silence or absence that I find pure torture. Information is not frightening – it is the lack thereof that is so difficult. Todd’s condition remains complicated and the seizures come often. They have moved him into ICU and he is now heavily sedated as he has not been since our struggles in ICU. It will be intense to return there, to be in a part of the building I thought was behind us. This is a more agressive approach necessary to move Todd out of this phase. The medications are terminated that could be a factor, the approach now is (like I said) more aggressive and if we are lucky by the end of this week Todd will be back in his room, and the apartment situation resolved. He won’t be wearing his bitchin’ Puma’s anymore… he now has a more permanent cast like solution to the foot drop. Soon, I am sure, he will have me bringing him chopsticks to get the itch way down deep. ( I had a cast as a young child, it was worth it though! I was the one who jumped from the highest level of the staircase! Winner! or something like that.) I so remember that itch that you can not magange to get to. This appears to be less permanent, I will talk to that doc on Thurs, at which point you will have an informed perspective on this one.

I am working hard to stay here or very near to the Jordaan. The place that when I go for lunch they ask how Todd is doing. It is a lovely combination of familiar, quiet, (not counting the bloody construction site) and good food, not to mention beautiful and near the metro. I did receive a good support phone call this morning, and I am confident we can work this out. To start anew in a neighborhood seems like a tall order…. But then it could give Davey a new project. (As if helping me move is not enough). To have peace this must be resolved, so I don’t worry about Todd and where I get to sleep and eat. Rest assured I am not alone, and those involved understand clearly the urgency, and are doing all they can to help. Except of course Simon, he is a bit ineffectual…… but we are giving him the opportunity to prove himself.


I would like to thank those busy folks who have been working hard to prepare for the BLUE AND GREEN BALL this SAT. I encourage you all to attend! This is a shining example of what a community can do to hold up one of their own! Just by showing up, you can lend your support for Todd and his lengthy recovery….. and get some of your Christmas Shopping done while you are at it at the BAzaaR. Check out the art that is to be auctioned off! Nice one guys!

By all means take pictures, and then each and every one of you can send me an email telling us tales of the evening. Who you met and that person you haven’t seen in a Coon’s age. I always thought Todd and I would be home by this event. In October, December seemed so very far away….. and now it is not.

Did you see those limited edition Frisbees?!! Man oh man.

It was just a few years back, we were doing this for another dear human BEing Tim North and His family Susee and Trista.(It was also at SOMARTS) I still laugh when I remember Todd and I going head to head with Eric & Jill during the auction for the cocktail cart! The back and forth glances, the enthusiasm!! Then how stoked Nathaniel was when he won his bid…… only to discover later he had bought something completely different than he thought! Duoh! So watch out guys and keep your eyes on the ball! The BLUE and GREEN ball that is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!