Today I am writing from the AMC, lugged my laptop, only to have Todd completely asleep today. It is always a reminder or a HUGE reality check after a good day, you walk in with the highest of expectations….. and receive less than the day before or so it seems. It can really flatten out your spirits. Rationally you understand this is part of the path of healing …. rest and sleep. Yet everyday we hope to have turned a corner where you needn’t look back. Recovering from such an extensive brain injury is no small feat, but Todd and I may have to take turns pushing each other.
So another day, when Todd is stronger, I will again lug my damn computer around, but since it is here I can write from his bedside in the moment. His speech pathologist did arrive while he was quite sleepy but did manage a few spoonfuls of yogurt.
So then….. when I was outside the nurse put on Todd’s glasses and with that came more words! (Just when I turned my back) So after all that, we still got some really nice moments. The nurse and I are hatching a plan for the weekend as well, there is always something new up my sleeve. We are anticipating the arrival of Todd’s lovely sisters, but with that comes the end of Jen’s stay. We got sweet words, he showed concern for us both and the loss of dear Joe, wanted water, and best of all more delicious bits of romance with his response being “Amazing” – his words not mine. We wrapped up the evening with a lovely rub down from shoulders to toe.
and I give you Jen…
Well, like Alex said, Todd was still pretty mellow when I first arrived at the hospital. We just hung out and chatted and made the best of it. BUT … while Alex was outside a strange thing happened … Todd’s nurse came in to feed him (through the nose tube). I mentioned to her that we weren’t sure how far Todd could see since he wasn’t wearing his glasses. She asked, “Well where are his glasses?” then whipped them out of the drawer, wiped them off, and shoved them onto his swollen head. In her loud, commanding voice, she asked, “Todd, do you like that?” Then, after not saying a word all day, Todd says “Push them more on the other side.” Well, I almost fainted.
With his tuned-up vision, the words kept coming. They’re whispers and hard to get sometimes, but they’re sweet. He even wanted to know how I was holding up with everything that’s going on. How Todd is THAT? Like he doesn’t have enough to think about right now.
Anyway, a long story about a brief pleasure. Every day a little more of Todd surfaces. It’s like peeling away layers of haze trying to get to the treat in the middle … slow, frustrating, and very gratifying when you get what you want …
Love.
Todd + Alex, and Jen
November 5, 2007 at 5:04 pm
It’s like a dance: step, step, glide to the side, back step, glide to the side, step…
Keep up the good work everyone,
Love, love, love
November 5, 2007 at 5:42 pm
I must admit that on most days when I read your postings it brings tears to my eyes- tears of joy for all the improvements! Alex your patient spirit is admirable. On the rough days just remember to take things day by day or even hour by hour. Please tell Todd that we miss his amazing soul and that jump in his step on CCA campus. I’m rooting for you (both) so very hard.
love
Michele Pred
November 5, 2007 at 6:31 pm
Hi Todd,
You are using your limited talk time
oh so very well
to get back here as soon as possible.
Craftily even.
Especially since all the body pieces
are reunited, and the hydraulics
have been tuned up.
Even with the required burst of body healing
to get past the Jabba the Hut phase.
You are doing a fine job of
keep us all around the world from getting fidgety.
Alex, I’m sorry if Todd’s ministrations to the far flung rest of us cut into your special talk space. Remember the telepathic touch channel, which you two own.
Love
Don
November 5, 2007 at 7:24 pm
Hello, darlings,
Hard, isn’t it. But Todd is making such amazing progress….it’s just that we want all of it now! Typical of us….typical for his recovery. Somehow it does work out….and we all make it through. But, let me tell you about the rapid growth of grey hair…..LOL!
Keep those glasses handy….being semi blind, myself, I can tell you that the world is only fuzzy and “maybe there” without them. It’s always remarkable to don a pair and SEE….wow! what a concept. Those of you with perfect or even semi perfect vision have no idea! I think I spent the whole 4 years at KU wondering if anyone else was on campus with me.
Anxious to hear about the result of sisters arriving…..I just know a totally ingrained “family” thing will come to the forefront and good things will come of it.
Alex…keep dragging that silly computer along….it will be so cool when you have it there and type a message “Todd just rolled over and sat on the side of the bed and said I’m ready to go home”. It COULD happen. We all have to think so!
Love you guys so much.
Aunt Jane & Bob
November 5, 2007 at 9:05 pm
Alex,
We wanted to let you know that you (and Todd) are in our thoughts – we’ve been reading and keeping up with Todd’s progress. We sense your optimism, and will continue to hope for the best, and support you in your thoughts.
warmly
Gene, Jeannie, Chloe and Max
November 5, 2007 at 10:29 pm
Hullo there, how many licks does it take to get to the essence of a Toddsie Pop?? That is the question of the moment. And the word of the day is “telepathy”, I was thinking of it earlier, and of course Don was right there with it. The Outernet, I suppose…
Todd (and all)- – I met with the Public Art Committee tonight, and they were pretty thrilled with the plans for the columns of light you and I had come up with. I fleshed out a couple of other sites, projecting how the two of us would work something out, and being careful to explain that it was only half of the equation, and that once we began working again, things would most likely change in those areas. We got some shimmer in there, we got some birds, and we got some Ohlone vibe as well. I have a wonderful binch of refernce material covering the latter to share. So I’m nudging it all along, and looking soooooo forward to getting back into the groove with you. Folks were very concerned about how you were doing, so you have the whole PAC rooting for you too.
Looking forward to the next dreamtime conference.
Love and hugs and heartfelt public art
November 6, 2007 at 6:26 am
Alex,
So happy to hear that the surgery went well and Todd is slowly coming back. I have been out of town with NO computer and was anxious to get back to a computer to check the blog and see how you and Todd were doing. Each day sounds like Todd is getting stronger. God Bless you both, keep up the great work Alex, your a HUGE factor at helping Todds recovery..the kisses, the touching,the stories,the body massages.
Sending healing energy to you and Todd.
A caring reader in Michigan.
Passion
November 6, 2007 at 9:26 am
Thinking of you and Todd’s fabulous sisters, during their travels and adjustments to times, etc.! 🙂
November 6, 2007 at 3:35 pm
Today i had a quick walk in at Todd’s and his bed was surrounded by women: his sisters, Jen, Alex, me and the nurse.. 😀 well Im quickely going back there, because even while Todds Loud Communication is still eyes, smiles and mouth movement, i felt welcomed by him. Cant wait to just sit there and just sit some. Todd, you looked very good with your headflaps back on, and i really hope you feel okay. The moving of you stiffer arm is a good thing. The nurse made your sister work your arm, and she did a good job 🙂
See you soon!
Toetsie in Amsterdam.